Changing the Rules


Write a new post in response to today’s one-word prompt. 


I talked with a girl last week who was wondering how far she should go in pursuing a kid she’s interested in.  I told her to let him do the pursuing.  I said, “If he’s interested in you, he will let you know.”  She laughed. “That’s really old-fashioned. These days, a girl can pursue a guy and nobody thinks anything of it.”

“I don’t think much of it either,” I responded.  I do not believe that the nature of the male of the species, in spite of the many efforts to feminize him, has changed all that much. Testosterone exists. Give it time. If he’s interested, he’ll do something about it.

I doubt very much she’ll  follow my counsel.  She’s pretty determined to “get” him.  Seems to me that no self-respecting man wants to be captured by a determined female, but then maybe I am just a tad old-fashioned.




But shouldn’t a girl be able to let a guy know if she’s attracted to him?  Well, sure. That’s been going on since Adam and Eve.  Most girls know how to do this without swaggering up to some guy and saying, “So, how about we get to know each other, Handsome?” Honestly most teen guys I know, even in this age of woman-as-pursuer, would be extremely uncomfortable with such an obvious approach.

Girls, you don’t need to make a fool of yourself to attract a guy’s attention.  A glance, a smile, an open and friendly demeanor, will go a lot farther with most guys than  to be openly hunted.

Of course, there are guys out there who have no scruples whatsoever, and the minute they think you’re interested they’ll move in on you and BAM!  they’ve got you on a hook that will cause you a lot of pain. It’s exciting at first, because they treat you as if they were just waiting for you to let them know you were interested. It soon becomes apparent, though, that they have wandering eyes, to say nothing of wandering hands.

Well.  Maybe I should write a book about how the nature of the human male is the same now as it’s always been. We may try to change the rules, but  we can’t change human nature.

Anyway, what self-respecting girl wants a guy who just sits passively waiting to be cut out of the herd? Not me!

Be friendly, be observant, be smart. Let him do the pursuing.

6 thoughts on “Changing the Rules

  1. I am glad Sheila that you are brave to hold on to the values most of us were brought up with. Times and life styles may have changed but some values still hold true. If the male does the pursuing it makes it special. Good on you!

    Liked by 1 person

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